This piece is for the parents of adult children who are lazy, self-destructive, or violent to benevolent members of society.
We will use the relationship between God and Lucifer/Satan as a starting point.
Some parents, mostly women, feel they should always be there for their children, no matter what the age or condition of the adult children,
or no matter what the adult child has done to someone else.
They intend to practice unconditional love, which they interpret as unconditional acceptance.
But, with lawbreaking adult children, this can mean creating an unsafe home for other family members
Therefore, I question the concept of unconditional love that includes unconditional acceptance.
God created all the angels, and Adam and Eve. He also sired Jesus through Mary. Every other mere mortal was created through copulation, using God’s DNA plan. Again, God created the angels. Angels belong to God more than human children belong to their parents.
He had more to do with each angel being created than human parents have to do with their children being born.
Creating angels and humans to love Him, God gave humans and angels free wills, so they could love Him.
But free will is dangerous. It makes humans and capable of hate, too.
It is said that Lucifer was one of God's top three angels, along with Michael and Gabriel. Lucifer was apparently in charge of the choir.
But then Lucifer became discontent as a servile, created being, even while being loved by God.
Perhaps he began to covet the glory that God received.
Perhaps he was tired of being a servant and just wanted to be in charge of his own life.
But either way, Lucifer realized that to get his own way, to have his own space, he would have to take over heaven, for he had no power to create a place of his own.
Lucifer led a rebellion with about 1/3 of the angels and tried to take over the Throne of God.
Michael and the warrior angels fought them and God threw them out of heaven.
Lucifer, renamed Satan, now tries continuously to turn people against the true and living God.
In Luke 10,
Jesus said, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.”
To fall like lightning means to be slammed down like a basketball dunk.
Who slammed him down?
Either God slammed Satan down, or God ordered Michael to do so.
Either way, it was a thorough rejection of who Lucifer chose to become.
On the Judgment Day, Jesus will say to the damned, “Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.” Matthew 25.
God created hell as a home for Satan, not for Lucifer.
So, did God once love Lucifer, His choir leader?
If God once loved Lucifer, does God now love Satan, since God created Hell to be Satan’s eternal abode?
Does God still love someone who by an unforgiveable act is now destined for hell?
Does God still love someone who is doing their best to destroy others?
How emotionally tough was it for God to create hell to hold someone He created, yet couldn’t be trusted in heaven?
Now, as I interpret the Bible, it was after Lucifer became Satan, that God created Adam and Eve.
I presume God did this to make up for the souls He lost at the Heavenly insurrection.
Why does God let Satan tempt us here on earth, leading people astray? I can’t answer that.
Since free-will brings temptations, Perhaps God decided the temptations should be done off-campus, away from heaven.
Next question; how closely should God’s attitude toward Satan dictate a parent’s attitude toward dangerous adult children?
We can’t love our children more that God loves us, or His angels.
That’s not a question, that’s a fact.
And yet God created Hell for angels and humans that reject Him.
So, does God quit loving the permanently fallen? I know he doesn’t let fallen angels back into heaven.
If you are the parent of a difficult adult, how does this make you feel?
Granted, there is a difference between an errant child and Satan; an adult child might be able to repent, if God allows it.
Satan is unable to repent because He rebelled against God, while seeing God face-to-face.
There is no hope for Satan or any of his fallen angels. Adult children will be able to repent if God grants them repentance.
I know there are times in my life when I was doing things I know didn’t please God, but I didn’t care. I’ve told God more than once,
“If I’m supposed to be sorry for this, You’re going to have to make be able to be sorry, because I’m not able to be sorry on my own.
I can’t generate regret on this, I can only acknowledge Your will.”
And God has done this for me, more than once.
Now, concerning unconditional acceptance…
Hell proves that God doesn’t practice unconditional acceptance.
So how should parents of adult children treat someone wanting to take over the house? And trust me, any young adult who expects free room and board, is taking over part of the house and making you their servant. Every functional human should have certain responsibilities.
Some adult children say, “My parents had me for their own selfish reasons; they can provide for me.
God created Lucifer for mutual love, within the bounds of the creator/creation relationship, but Lucifer rejected that.
His consequence is eternal separation and torment.
As children become adults, they gain autonomy from their parents.
Autonomy not only means authority, it also means personal responsibility.
But we never outgrow the authority that God has over our lives.
Should parents continue to love errant adult children? Should parents continue to provide a home for them?
If you say yes to the first and ‘no’ to the second question, how do you love someone and reject their presence?
(Those kind of people don’t deal well with complete rejection. They want more and more.
Particularly if they are using drugs or are too lazy to work.)
What if you have to choose between pleasing a difficult child and having a safe home for yourself and everyone else?
You know the answer.
If God can totally reject someone He created….
It seems to me one demonic strategy is to hold parents to a higher standard than God himself is obligated to fulfill.
This a ploy to keep evil in the home, explicitly to destroy that home. True or False?